(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
