So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
