You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
