meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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