Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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