I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
