everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
We need to feng shui this bitch.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
