You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Randomize
