Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
