I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
