is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize