you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Bring me that man meat
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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