I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
