I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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