this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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