I love black thongs
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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