she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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