All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Randomize
