I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
