is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
