all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize