i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
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