Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
