Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
