as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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