So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
