Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
