HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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