Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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