I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
