i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
