Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize