I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
