at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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