sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
