he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
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