Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize