Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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