i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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