im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
The air was thick with penises
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Randomize
