and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
