How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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