Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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