I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
But we have bathrooms and they dont
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
