and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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