Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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