just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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