I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
