he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
