Hey man sorry I got all grabby
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
