: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
